I missed my blogging yesterday, but I did read two chapters of Matthew. Anyway, you know that. I was listening to Casting Crowns "Mercy" on the way home. I was almost home but when I got to: "Your mercy saved me, mercy made me whole. Your mercy found me, called me as your own" I couldn't help but cry. As tears rolled down my face, I became so grateful for your mercy. I also was saddened by the fact that Derek didn't accept that mercy. If only you called him as your own, I know he would still be here.
It's still so hard. Thinking about the depression I've been going through myself, I have never gotten so low that I wanted to end my own life. I know that is only because of your mercy. Your hand is always there to pick me back up. You do hold me close. And for that, I am forever grateful.
Thank you for my friends and family who have prayed for me, patted me on the back, hugged me, cried with me, loved me, and comforted me. It means so much to me. They may never really know how much it means, especially if they've never gone through anything like I have so intensely in the past several months. I've never come out and said it but if they read my blogs, they know. Continue to watch over us, Lord. Protect us from the ones with Antichrist hearts.
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